SOMETIMES LOVE ISN'T ENOUGHT
“And here we are. Going backwards all the time” he said to
me.
He looked me straight in my eyes. I could see the tears in
his eyes. Once, I was able to see my whole world in those two, blue-skied eyes.
Now, I only see tears and they don’t mean anything to me. Can you imagine that
I didn’t even felt sorry for it?! It was like I was waiting for this moment all
this time. I knew it was over. I couldn’t even apologize. “When did I get this
much evil” - I said to myself.
I was able to feel
the distance almost a year ago. He was occupied with his work and with his
friends, and didn’t even think about our relationship. I tried, I really tried.
I give my most beautiful years to him. What for?
It happened a week ago. I was out with my friends; he was
tired again as always to join us. We were drinking and partying all night long.
There was this guy, a friend of my roommate. He was playing guitar, singing
with his sensual voice. I felt some tension between the two of us, but I
ignored it. Later that night or I should say early in the morning, we went
home. My roommate said to me that she was going to stay at her boyfriend. So I
went home alone. Five minutes after, someone rang on my doorbell. It was him.
The boy with the guitar. He asked to come in, I didn’t say no. I was drunk, but
that is not an excuse. I went to the bathroom, and when I came back to the room
all the light were off, except the red light we had on the wall. A slow music
was playing on his phone. I knew it was wrong, but something inside me was
saying to do it. We started to dance. Slowly we were moving. Then he kissed me,
and I didn’t oppose. I want it. That night I felt alive and loved after a long,
long time.
Early in the morning, I said what happened to my boyfriend.
And from then, he comes every night at my house and cries to me. But no, he is
not crying for what I have done. He is crying because he is conscious that he
has lost me a long time ago. I still love him, but sometimes love isn’t enough.
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